Personal Growth

Although I have written about this idea before, I feel like it’s one worth elaborating on. We live in an age of instant gratification, which I think leaves us often feeling underwhelmed. In most cases, this disappointment is due to our expectations being too high. There is, of course, a simple solution to this problem: lower your expectations. On the surface you might think “but why should I lower my standards?”, and I’ll try to make the case for why you should.

I have a saying, or perhaps a mantra, that I like to repeat to myself: “High hopes, low expectations”. I think I could do a whole stand up comedy routine about this subject. Some people, I suspect, go through life feeling disappointed for the simple reason that they expect too much. Whether in their relationships, careers, or personal lives, they set themselves up for constant disappointment by setting their expectations far too high.

When it comes to personal growth, if that’s something you care about, it’s worth thinking about your blind spots, your biases, and anything else that might be holding you back. I tend to have a lot of conversations with strangers, and lately I’ve been making more of any effort to listen rather than speak. It’s quite a simple yet powerful way to learn about others, and yourself too, in the process. People will reveal a surprising amount if you simply give them space and keep your mouth shut. A few questions here and there to move things along helps, but the questions matter less than giving others time to speak (and you’ll find that people will often fill the gaps themselves).