Jobs

In the olden days, we had résumés, and today, well, some of us still have résumés (or curriculum vitaes, if you prefer). But now, we also have social media profiles, which–to some folks–are the new résumés. They are the new first impression for the chronically online, the new first point of contact, the new first everything. And in the context of getting a job, these profiles and our Internet behavioural breadcrumbs are the new first thing that can get you hired or not hired. Let’s hope those recruiters don’t find your Reddit profile.

Anyone who’s worked in computers for any amount of time has likely experienced a deluge of recruiter spam over the years. Most recruiters use the same strategy men use on dating apps: spray and pray, ask questions later. The primary beneficiaries of this strategy are companies like Microsoft (the parent of LinkedIn), for which LinkedIn generates about $4bn in revenue per quarter (‼️) for their spam facilitation, according to their latest earnings report1.

I had the recent pleasure of speaking with someone from a big tech company about their interview process. They wanted to put me through the funnel to run the gauntlet and see if I “had what it takes” to make it to the offer stage. I declined, but (against better judgement) I gave them 30 minutes to pitch their company to me anyway.

The word on the street is there’s a “labour shortage”. If we look at the data, however, it tells a different story. I’ve heard theories about people retiring, or too many COVID excess deaths, or people being flush with cash because the government gave everyone a coulpe thousand bucks (which is about one month’s rent), but looking at the data I’m not seeing numbers that reflect most of those theories.

Software engineers are likely familiar with the CAP theorem, something coined by Eric Brewer. In short: the CAP theorem posits that distributed databases can have at most 2 of 3 attributes where a database is either consistent, available, or fault tolerant. In other words, you can have a DB that is consistent and highly available, but not fault tolerant. Or, you can have a DB that’s fault tolerant and highly available, but isn’t always consistent (especially in the event of failure).

Over the last 5 years of my career I’ve shifted my priorities in life. When I was younger, I was willing to deal with a lot of bullshit at work so long as they kept paying me a salary. Nowadays, I care more about my own happiness, and I’m not willing to work with people who are jerks.